Music to me

Taste is a very peculiar thing. During my earliest years of existence I didn't pay much thought to what I heard, it was just pop music which my parents played on the TV. It was mostly old and foreign, though I knew of both new and domestic music as well. Until the end of middle school there were only a couple of songs I would listen to at a time.

I believe it was TV shows ("Watamote" and "Death Note" come to mind) which awoke a major change in my yearning for sound. I was pulled in by grim imagery and unusual soundscapes. At the same time I gave some attention to the religion-philosophy of Satanism, which I had an immature attitude towards at the time (unsurprisingly, having in mind my age). Groups such as Ghost came to populate my ear due to that theme, but I still hadn't developed a particular musical taste, I still limited myself to individual tracks.

The opening of "Watamote", a show which means a lot to me.

My father got an electric guitar for me, per my plea, and ever since I spent numerous hours in practice of playing and exploration of music theory, because I had and still have the tremendous wish to compose. I'm not as successful as I'd like to be, but I won't be giving up anytime soon, despite the number of my current responsibilities, which I view as merely ephemeral.

Fast-forward to the beginning of high school, I attained plenty of rudimentary knowledge of metal music and the subculture therein. At the time I was actually really leaning towards modern deathcore (which has a simpler yet more aggressive sound and which could, despite its authentic hardcore punk origins, be more aptly described as alternative metal with death elements). Then I got closer to more concrete metal music, I became a fan of groups such as Death, Revocation, Cattle Decapitation, and Obscura. I became a true fan of technical death metal. With time, my love grew towards more progressive groups.

Then I had reached an epiphany, an entire range of doors now open to me. My ear shifted nearly exclusively to progressive metal. The earliest might be Caligula's Horse, a band which cannot receive enough praise. Leprous, Haken, Others By No One... It's an extensive list which mostly resides in my Spotify history.

Surprisingly enough, today, I'm no opponent of the domestic mainstream pop hip-hop fusion, which is very saturated here in the Balkan peninsula. It's not good to put others down for listening to something I don't deem worthy, not everything has to be serious.

For most of my free time, music was the only person I could talk to, I spent endless hours just laying or sitting and listening. It wasn't unusual for a day to pass that way. I had a good time with most of my high school classmates, but outside of it, nobody was really concerned with what I was doing. I have kept some friends out of that bunch, they care enough for me to appreciate that, and I shared further positive experiences with them: they invite me to their birthdays and so on. Additionally, before and after I got involved with my girlfriend, I showed her much of what I listened to, and luckily enough, she liked it. She also helped me discover plenty of music I hadn't heard up to that point.